The timing of this prompt is quite ironic; I've been seriously playing around with the idea of shutting this blog down (or just limiting my posts).
I just haven't been feeling "it" much anymore. What "it" is, I'm not really sure.
It's not that I want to be the #1 blog of all blogs, because I don't. I really don't. I have no desire to go to blogging conferences or do giveaways or whatever is needed to become a top blogger. But I do want something... right? I mean if I didn't want something out of this, why not just stick with the private blog I have? Why open myself up to anyone and everyone if I didn't care about any of it?
I love taking and sharing pictures of my Lovie. I love talking about her. If it weren't for her, this blog wouldn't exist. She is the reason I am Finally Mom after all. But it gets old sharing photos and stories with strangers and not getting much of anything in return... and I know a big part of that is my fault for trying to blog with a shit computer (meaning I was blogging and reading tons of blogs but unable to comment on their blogs because my computer would shut down). But I've got a new computer now and am trying hard to visit and post elsewhere... but I still feel like it's not helping. I still feel like I'm just not feeling "it" much anymore.
I like this blog, but it's just a blog. It's just something to pass time when I'm at work. I rarely even think of this blog on the weekends, and I don't want to.
So what gives? If I feel like this blog is just something to pass the time, then why do I feel so blah about it?
I guess we all want to be heard. Maybe that's it. Maybe it's that I've gone most of my life on the sidelines and now that I'm ready and able to actually get out there and play, it's hard when there's nobody to play with.
Or something.
I took a year break from my blog, and the only reason I started blogging again is because my husband deployed and I was lonely, needing communication with other moms and writers. The year break was great. And now that I am blogging again I realize why I blog: because it helps me to write my thoughts down and send it out into the world wide web. Yes, it's nice to get feedback on my thoughts, ideas, feelings, but even if I don't get comments I still am glad that I blog because for some reason, just writing a post and putting it out there makes me feel vulnerable, exposed and this helps me to think more, deeper, clearer about myself. I'm sorry if what I say doesn't make sense, it's hard to describe.
ReplyDeleteBut I hope whatever you chose works for you! I didn't really miss blogging at all during the year I stopped, I don't think I intended to come back, and I may not blog forever. But for now it works. Best wishes to you in your decisions :)
I love reading your blog, as you know. As far as comments, I think sometimes it's hard to comment on your posts because they are so personal in an emotional way. Does that make sense? I'm an asshole on my blog a lot. You never are. People tend to respond more to assholes. :)
ReplyDeleteI think we all go through this sometimes...I feel like I'm in a little bit of a blogging "rut" myself. I really have no advice, just wanted to say that I understand and I feel ya!
ReplyDeleteStopping by from Mama Kat's…
ReplyDeleteI think the other comments said what I was going to say. It is real easy to feel burned out. Don't let the frustration of not getting comments rule over if you post or not. Sometimes we write for ourselves and not for others.
Hoping you find what is best for your blog.
I think we all go through up and downs with this. You don't need to post a certain amount so you could cut back. Or take a break and see if you miss it. You can always come back if you want. : )
ReplyDeleteI have felt that same way many times, and have taken a blogging hiatus! Even if you only use it as a means to document times of your babies life, you'll always have it!
ReplyDeleteI was thinking about doing this for my prompt - my challenge is ignoring the numbers and trying to not compete because there is only so much I feel I can (or will do). What ever you decide will be great but I will miss you!
ReplyDeletePS I don't comment as often as I should so I tweet, like or now google + the post when I don't comment. ;)
I hear you. I understand how you feel.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I pour my heart out and nobody says a word in response. It is like they couldn't have said "I don't give a rip" any louder than if they'd been screaming it in my face.
Very limited response and not knowing which direction to take with any of my blogs is why the majority of my posts now are responses to other people's meme/linky parties.
I go through each of the ones I am involved with and do at least the minimum visiting of other blogs, but generally visit more than the meme requires. I almost always end up following the blogs that I visit. But, I don't always get comments from the others. That can be a bit depressing, but being invisible is something that I'm used to. Yeah, I know, whiney baby here. :)
In the end, though, I do it because I want to, to pass the time, and to hopefully get back the words that were stolen from me when someone tried to snatch life from me in the fall of 2006.
I'm here from Writer's Workshop. Have a great day!
hi from mamakat's
ReplyDeleteFirst time I've read some of your blog. If you decide to stick around, I'll be reading much more :) btw I can see why you'd want to post pics of your daughter...she's ADORABLE
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ReplyDeleteYou know I love to read your blog and I would miss it terribly if it were gone. Still, I have other ways of tracking you down, buddy! We can play together on other fields ;)
ReplyDeleteI get what you're saying. I will never be some great blogger, nor do I intend to be. Yet, it is such a relief when you spill your guts and someone out there pipes up to say "I hear you and you aren't alone". When it's all crickets and tumbleweeds rolling by I tend to conclude that I'm boring or that I really am the only who feels whatever it is I just wrote about.
been there. there are times when i have to ask myself what the heck i'm doing and what's the point anyway. for some reason i just keep going. as soon as i'm ready to give up - something happens to get me to stick around. maybe it's the community of it all? :)
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