three years ago, 12/28

(taken from my journal written 12/30/2009)

12/28/09:
-7am Cervadil is taken out and another exam reveals more effacement and a softer cervix; they start the Pitocin

-contractions start to get stronger and stronger and closer together by around 9am

-at Noon I get up to pee and get into bed and as I situate myself into the uncomfortable bed, I feel a sort of twist inside on my right side near my lower abdominal area. I then feel like I wet the bed and this makes me start to freak out a bit. Surely my water couldn't be breaking just five hours after the Pitocin started! Something must be wrong with my sweetpea! DH calls the nurse and she's on break so her replacement comes in and at this point, I now feel the urgent urge to take a dump. This makes me freak out even more because I've heard time and time again how real labor pains feel like you have to push out the hugest poop ever - and that's what was happening to me... but again, surely it was too soon!
I try telling the nurse that I think maybe my water broke but had no clue - and that I had to really go to the bathroom. Apparently I wasn't very kind or maybe I was just freaking out a bit because the nurse, trying to remain calm and keep me calm, looked at me like I was crazy. She wanted to check and see if indeed my water had broken but I told her that I really needed to go to the bathroom. We went round and round for a hot minute. I have a feeling that while I did have the urgency to have a bowel movement, I was more freaked out that the whole "labor and delivery" thing was ACTUALLY happening. That, and I couldn't get all the I Didn't Know I was Pregnant shows I had seen out of my head where the moms end up giving birth to their babies in the toilet!
I finally calmed down enough to allow the nurse to ensure the water had broke and that's when my regular nurse came back in the room - and she did confirm that my water had broke and I was in active labor!
The contractions were fierce and scary. I was asked if I wanted an epidural and I immediately accepted. The room became incredibly warm and sweat dripped from every pore on my being as I clutched onto the nurse and rolled my back in position while listening to the doctor in charge of the epidural tell me not to move over and over again and again. The whole procedure took a good twenty or thirty minutes to complete (at least it did in my head), but once completed, life was good again. I felt NOTHING for hours to come.

-my cervix was checked a couple times in the hours to come and things were progressing nicely.

-finally around 9PM the doctor had come to see me to do an internal and I was 100% effaced and almost 100% dialated, but not quite there yet. She waited about an hour and in the meantime, I told them I was feeling quite nauseated to which they said "was good" as it would "help push" the baby out.

-around 9:30PM, after 28 hours without any solid food, I vomited for about 10 minutes straight

-around 10PM, the doc came back and I still wasn't quite 10 cm dialated but they decided to let me try and push and see what would happen.

-just before midnight, after two hours of pushing, the doctor urged me once again to have a c-section... this time because the baby's heart rate dropped every time I pushed. I assured everyone I was willing to keep trying to push her out but was wanting the best for the baby so opted for the c-section after a couple more minutes of pushing (apparently baby's head would start to come out and the doc would get a grip but as soon as I stopped pushing, the head popped back up inside the birth canal).