I'm fucking tired today. Exhausted.
I hate being back to work. It probably wouldn't be so bad if I was impacting lives or, I dunno, busy. You'd think after two months off, I'd be busy. But noo. Not me. And I know I shouldn't complain. I know I'm "lucky" to have a job. This job. And it's not horrible or anything like that. I like the company for the most part. I like the building and my environment (except for the shrilly voiced, annoying as fuck woman that sits next to me). I like that I can face my computer in such a way that nosey passersby can't see what's on my screen. I like that I can accrue my vacation and sick time if I want.
But I don't like that I'm here and my baby is in daycare. I don't like that at all. I've waited so long to be a mom, to be blessed with the most amazing gift ever imaginable. And after only two months with her... just as she started to really become this little person with a smile and a giggle and a personality... I have to ship her off to someone else while I sit here blogging.
WTF?!
Whatever. It is what it is. I need to buck up and get a hold of myself and accept it already.
But that doesn't mean I have to stop complaining does it?
I need another cup of coffee right now.
I hate being back to work. It probably wouldn't be so bad if I was impacting lives or, I dunno, busy. You'd think after two months off, I'd be busy. But noo. Not me. And I know I shouldn't complain. I know I'm "lucky" to have a job. This job. And it's not horrible or anything like that. I like the company for the most part. I like the building and my environment (except for the shrilly voiced, annoying as fuck woman that sits next to me). I like that I can face my computer in such a way that nosey passersby can't see what's on my screen. I like that I can accrue my vacation and sick time if I want.
But I don't like that I'm here and my baby is in daycare. I don't like that at all. I've waited so long to be a mom, to be blessed with the most amazing gift ever imaginable. And after only two months with her... just as she started to really become this little person with a smile and a giggle and a personality... I have to ship her off to someone else while I sit here blogging.
WTF?!
Whatever. It is what it is. I need to buck up and get a hold of myself and accept it already.
But that doesn't mean I have to stop complaining does it?
I need another cup of coffee right now.
I don't really have the energy at this time to complain anymore anyway... not after wasting the morning so far on creating yet another blog (you know, to add to the recipe blog, the pregnancy blog, the miscarriage blog, the 2nd pregnancy blog, the baby blog) with another free template.
Coffee. That's my mission right now. Find some and drink some. Now.
Coffee. That's my mission right now. Find some and drink some. Now.
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