TILTW: 6.8-6.14

 

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I suck at being sick and not being able to breathe and not being able to control my cough.

**
Lovie and I now use the same hair product in our hair: Kinky-Curly Curling Custard. Stuff is awesome. Too bad it's not cheaper.

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Did I mention I hate having summer colds?

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Still looking for Father's Day gift ideas? Check out THIS easy, memorable one.

yyeeeeeaaaaaah

Been in funk.

And then this happened: MY KID IS ON THE HUFF POST.

It might have something to do with this (from nearly a year ago):

Maybe I'll try brushing her hair out again and seeing how much bigger it is these days for comparison. Nearly 3.5 years old and still haven't even trimmed her hair (though I did have to cut out a dreadlock a couple months back).

trivial

I'm a no-frills type of girl. Always have been. I grew up loving soccer and dreamed of being the first female Pele of the world. But my body didn't agree with my heart and by the time I was 10 or so, I looked to be much older.

Melinda, seven years older, was all girl and loved boys. I don't even know how many times I came home from playing outside to see her underneath a boy on the scratchy green couch in our living room. She wore a lot of makeup and tight jeans, and loved getting attention from those of the opposite sex. She used her big boobs (clearly in the genes) to her advantage.

I found it all quite revolting.

I liked boys. I wanted to play with boys. There may have been a few I thought were cute and wouldn't mind kissing. There may have been a few that I did kiss in the alley during the summer months.

But using my body as a means to get their attention was not something I was interested in at all. Not at 10, not at 20, 30, or 40.

I think it had something to do with the undressing glances I would get from 50-year-old men when I was way too young to feel their eyes on me like that.

It didn't stop me from wearing makeup though, which started around 13 or 14. Eye makeup only. Maybe I was hoping that by highlighting my green eyes, I could get attention away from my chest.

 

As if.

Through the years I've had stages when I’d be all about wearing eye makeup to wearing none. Currently I'm in a no-makeup stage which started when Oma’s health started to decline. And now with these allergies kicking my ass and then some, it's still best to go without.

I probably look like hell to a lot of people. I'm fat (really). I'm short. I don't wear makeup. My clothes are years and years old. I rarely get a professional haircut. And my dark brown hair is being overruled with silver.

 

 

I'm sure people look at me and think, "Oh there's another one who's let herself go."

But I’m OK with that. I am. It’s so much easier not to give a shit what others think—especially about my appearance. There’s much bigger fish to fry than whether or not I’m wearing the latest trend.

 

Really, who fucking cares?

And as for the hair? It’s been a long road, but I’ve come to love my silvers. And good thing, too. Otherwise, I may have taken offense to this drawing Lovie made of me the other day.

 

 

It’s official. I’m a blue haired.

TILTW: 1.5-1.11

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Not all people suck. Thank you for that. And thank you oh so much for all the heartfelt comments on Tuesday's post about my Oma. According to my mom, things are pretty much the same. :/

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I absolutely detest potty training.

***

I've really come to *like* my hair. It used to be that I hated how curly and frizzy my hair was (when I was a teen) but then I was able to grow it longer and longer and the length helped weigh down some of the curls. Then I discovered anti-frizz products (about 10-15 years ago) and I started to really like my hair. But then it started to gray. And gray. And after Lovie was born three years ago, it's like I just couldn't stop the gray. And now I'm at a point where a good portion of it is gray. I've been lamenting for years as to whether or not to color it and have really just come to terms with it and, actually, I really do like it. It's part of who I am. It's just hair, yes, but it's my hair. My curls. My frizz. My gray. (And Lovie says it's "black" so that helps me feel like maybe it's not as gray as I think it is.)

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And, speaking of hair, I've discovered an awesome website on how to deal with Lovie's hair. ChocolateHairVanillaCare has so much information on how to handle her hair. From products to styles and more. I absolutely love it and because of the info on that site, I "banded" Lovie's hair Wednesday night and it's resulted in two days of super cute, funky styles that I think match Lovie's personality. And Lovie's been talking about wanting really long "mermaid" type hair so I figure the banding may help lengthen her hair when I take them out. I'm excited to see what it looks like tonight (or tomorrow) when I take the bands out!

left to right: weds night, thursday morning, friday morning. does it make you cringe to see so much mis-match?! :D

*****

this weekend

FRIDAY

"Is that for me?" she gasps, her eyes widening and a smile covering her face. "Are those butterfly wings? For me??"

"Sure baby," I answer, cringing at the sight of fuscia and glitter. Oh how I hate glitter. And pink.

I help her get the wings and tutu on over the dress she's worn for the day. "Wait, here's a magic wand, too!"

thank you MommySHORTS and one of your sponsors to the Evil Glare-off getting this to us in just days!

"A magic wand?!" she repeats with glee, her eyes sparkling like the glitter on her wings.


SATURDAY

While Taye took Lovie to gymnastics and lunch, I spent a couple hours at the salon getting my nails and hair done (thanks to a gift card Taye gave me for my birthday in September). It's been over three years (August 2009), since having anyone cut my hair, but I was ready. I wanted to keep the length (no Mom cut, please), but I wanted it shorter in the back, longer in the front.

She did the opposite.

Of course.

Meh, it's all good though. At least I have hair.

As for the nails, I went with a super dark purple/almost black color for both my toes and fingers. Normally I go dark for my toes, but rarely do I get manicures and never have I gone too dark. I figured with Halloween coming up, why not live a little.

I love them. Love Love Love them. I definitely think I'll get more manis and go dark again.

When Lovie noticed them she said, "What happened?" as she held a finger.

"I got my nails painted," I replied.

"Why black? What about pink?"

She was super confused, but has since moved on.


SUNDAY

We hung out inside all day... watching TV, playing monster and hide n seek, painting.



My heart is *so* full.



TILTW: 9.29-10.5

* We're super excited and ready for Halloween. I was a bit apprehensive about how Lovie would react to it all this year, but she's super excited. She loves all the decorations at school, at home, and on some houses that go all out with "spooky" decor. I think school must be talking about it all in a fun way and that's helping her think of this as being fun and spooky instead of creepy and scary. Hell, she even picked out this guy for our window:

And she adores my witch laugh and can be heard saying, "I vant to suck your blood heh heh heh." It's fun. So much fun. And I'm so glad she's into it as much as she is this year and I'm so glad we've got an entire month to be excited about it.


* I'm so super damn excited to report that one week from today, not only will I not be working, but I'll be sitting my fat, happy ass in a salon for half a day as I continue celebrating my 40th birthday by using a gift certificate Taye got me: 4-layer facial, hair cut, mani & pedi. It's been over three years since I've gotten my hair cut by a professional! And apparently, the person I'm scheduled with, specializes in curly hair. So damn excited! Currently, my mop is all one length hitting just below the bra strap. But because there's so dang much of it, I very rarely wear it down and can be seen, most days, wearing it like this:

But right before having Lovie, it looked more like this:

And that's what I'm hoping to get back to. Of course it's much more gray now, but I'm still super damn excited about chopping it and getting back to being able to wear it down more.


* I was flipping through channels last night and caught the ending clip to Amber Behind Bars, a new show or special that MTV will be airing about Teen Mom "star" Amber. I know it's 2012 and all but really? REALLY? I was going to link to the show or the clip, etc, but fuck that. Just fuck that.


* Apparently I'm not the only one who has evil fantasies about people who annoy them. Some of the comments on this post cracked me up so.

this is why i should've used the self checkout lane at the grocery store

“Is your hair naturally…”

“Yes,” I answered before the cashier finished her sentence, expecting her to be asking if it was naturally curly since I get asked that a lot.

“Gray?”

Did she just ask me if my hair was naturally GRAY? Are you fucking kidding me? Is there someone behind me?

I quickly toss my curls in a way that allows me to look behind me for a moment to make sure nobody’s there. Nope, nobody but me.

“It’s so pretty,” she continued.

Really? My GRAY hair is pretty? PRETTY? GRAY?

“Thanks,” I smiled and then admitted, “I thought you were asking if it was naturally curly, but, yes the gray is natural, too.”

I mean, do people color their hair gray ON PURPOSE (coolio celebs excluded, of course)?

“You’re very lucky. I’ve been coloring mine for 30 years now to cover the gray.”

I smiled. I am lucky but certainly not because of my GRAY hair.

“Yeah I stopped coloring mine when I got pregnant.”

“Oh are you pregnant now?” She looks down at my belly.

THIS CONVERSATION KEEPS GETTING BETTER AND BETTER!!! WILL YOU PLEASE BE MY NEW BEE EF EF?!?

“Uh no. That was 3 years ago.”

“Oh well I love it. It almost looks frosted.”

FROSTED?!? WHO FROSTS THEIR HAIR ANYMORE?!? HOW OLD DO YOU THINK I AM?!??

I stuff my debit card back into my wallet.

“I want to stop coloring mine but I’ve asked the colorist if it will be full gray if I stop and she says yes. So I keep on coloring.”

I smile.

“But I cheat and take those touch up boxes and have my 18 year old just add it to any gray she sees every coupla weeks.”

“Oh that’s a great idea! I’ll have to keep that in mind for when my two and a half year old is able to do that. Then maybe I’ll start coloring my hair.” Take that mother to 18 year old! My kid’s only 2.5! See, I’m really not that old after all!

“No don’t start coloring it. It’s not solid gray and it really does look so nice.”

“Well, thanks. I’ve never had anyone tell me that they actually LIKE my gray hair so I’ll take it.”

“I actually don’t LIKE gray hair,” she says giving me my receipt. “But yours is so pretty because it’s not solid. If mine could look like that I wouldn’t color it. Don’t start!”

 
Two weeks away from turning 40, guess what’s on my mind?

WHO’S GONNA WASH THAT GRAY RIGHT OUTTA MY HAIR?!?

Just kidding. I've grown to love my natural hair (until someone asks me if I'm Lovie's Grandmother).

Not-So-WW: the Twist and Shout

Lovie's hair is naturally curly thanks to my natural curl (which didn't surface till puberty hit and then HOLYCRAPCURL happened) and thanks to her daddy's afro ways. I know (from years of crying over dealing with my hair) a few things about dealing with hair like hers because it's how I had to start dealing with my own hair:

1. Limit hair washing to once or twice a week.
2. NEVER comb/brush while dry.
3. ALWAYS and ONLY ever comb with a wide tooth comb whilst hair is wet with gobs of conditioner.
4. Always use a leave in conditioner.
5. Try not to ever touch hair once it's "styled".

So this is how I manage Lovie's mop. It works out well because only washing it once or twice a week and not combing it when dry saves us lots of time in the morning. I get her up, spritz her hair with some frizz free tangle tamer product, scrunch a bit, and go. And since I always am answered with "No!" (her favorite word) when I ask if I can put her hair up, it's even easier.

Well, Monday, the day after we washed her hair, she came home with sand in her hair. UGH. Sand. In her hair. In her mop of curls. Tight curls.

DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO GET ITTY BITTY PIECES OF SAND FROM THE SCALP OF A CHILD WHOSE HAIR NATURALLY NESTS ANY AND EVERY LITTLE THING IMAGINABLE BECAUSE THE CURLS JUST TRAP IT ALL THERE?!?

Very hard. Very, very, very hard.

I now hate sand more than I hate glitter. And glitter, prior to this new encounter with sand, used to be referenced as the Devil.

Anyway, after about an hour of running water through her hair while she screamed and cried, "No mama!! NO MAMA!!!!!" (while I flashed back to the movie Mommy Dearest: "No more wire hangers Sand!!"), after washing and scrubbing and rinsing and fluffing and rinsing some more, I finally got her out of the tub and, while she was glued to the TV, twisted her hair for the first time.

WHY HAVEN'T I DONE THIS SOONER?

Oh, because she hates having her hair/head touched.

So yeah, I twisted little sections of hair, while wet (though next time I need to make sure each section is really wet because by the time I got to the back, it just didn't look as good as the front ones), sent her to bed, and the next day I threw the twists, still in tact (holla!), up in a ponytail. Super cute.

Then last night, before bed, I let the ponytail down and she (her hair) became all Coolio on me,

and for my amusement, I didn't untwist and sent her to bed. 

Then this morning, I untwisted, spritzed, and off we went.

I still think sand is very evil. Even if it did lead me to finally twisting her hair.

a weekend listicle

10 things from the Weekend: a Listicle

linking this photo up with The Paper Mama

* Lovie and I stopped off at the park on Friday; we were the only people there. It was cold so I put a pair of baby legwarmers on her arms and hands so her hands wouldn't get so cold (hence the robotic look in the photo).  While she was climbing one of the ladders, she lost her foot and landed- crotch first- onto one of the bars. Oh dear MY crotch was hurting after that. I felt so bad for her but she wanted to keep playing and went ahead and climbed the same ladder again. Rock star kiddo.

* Saturday morning, the hubs took Lovie to gymnastics while I stayed home to clean and wait for the gas company which never showed. After they got back home, Lovie asked to take a nap (seriously) so she took one and shortly after she woke, my mom came over. While she was napping, the hubs told me how it had been one of the best days of his life. "She was so happy!" he said. Turns out they were early to gymnastics so they stopped at the park near the gymnastics place since it was so beautiful out.  When it was time to leave for gymnastics, Lovie asked to stay at the park so they did. And they played and climbed and swung and slided.  "She was just so happy," he said. "She would do something and laugh about it and she was just so happy. It was the greatest day of my life." It was awesome listening to him gush. "That's why we stop off at the park so much," I commented. "Because it really does make her so happy."

* After "Gamma" came, we talked about going back to the park. Friday's cold temperatures turned upward. It was beautiful out. We never made it out, though. Instead we all played Tea Party until a pizza arrived. Then we ate and watched a little TV before putting Lovie to bed and rushing out the door. Gamma was spending the night so the hubs and I went to a movie- Project X. Lovie will never be leaving the house without us.

* Yesterday was incredible. The temperature reached 70, there were no clouds in the sky, the birds were chirping like crazy. An absolute picture perfect day. Lovie, Gamma, and I headed out to the park pretty early. I wanted to bottle the day it was so perfect. When we got home, fresh, homemade waffles were waiting for us- thanks the hubs.

Gamma got Lovie this Tea Set for Easter- this photo is from February when she was playing with it at her cousin's house

* We chatted for a bit, Lovie poured everyone tea. The sun beamed in, the cats stretched in the sun puddles. My mom and I played Words with Friends even though we sat across the table from one another and could've just played Scrabble.

* I made ham and egg cups (so damn easy and good) and potatoes for lunch. We all chowed down despite just having had waffles a couple hours prior.

* Lovie went down for a nap. Gamma left to go home. I took a nap.

* I woke, then Lovie woke and we had some Doritos.

* We thought about going back outside, out to the park. The weather was just so unbelievably perfect. I'm generally not an outdoorsy type of person; I don't mind sitting my fat ass inside. But there was just something about this weekend, about yesterday that made me want to be outside. At one point, I even commented to the hubs how I kind of wished we had a deck or a backyard; I wanted to go out, but I didn't want to walk 6 blocks to the park. So Lovie and I watched Bubble Guppies while Daddy made some sugar cookies.

* I gave Lovie a bath and washed her hair and fell even more in love with the Mixed Chicks hair products we got the other week. Man, does the shampoo smell good. Man, does the conditioner kick ass and make it easier to comb through her hair. Man, does the leave-in conditioner work nicely. And man oh MAN do I LOVE the tangle-tamer spray for the next day. This line of products is sincerely worth every single penny. It's not cheap but a little of each goes a long way and Lovie's hair is just way more manageable.

How was your weekend?

Welcome Wordless Wednesday: This Momma's never been Girly Girl

Rock Star Hair

Let me preface this with a reminder of my age: Old.

Ha, just kidding- sort of.

I remember one of the kids at Lovie's daycare talking about how her daddy just celebrated his 35th birthday and I asked if she thought that was old and she, without any hesitation, replied, "Yes."

Well... I'm older than that.

Anyway!

As a baby I had a full head of hair but it was stick straight. Always thick though, but straight. My parents liked to keep it cut in that toss-a-bowl-over-the-kids-head-and-take-a-pair-of-scissors-to-the-edge-of-the-bowl cut. I don't understand this cut and I've seen it on kids today, too. WHY?!? When I hit puberty, my hair started to get curly. And curlier and curlier. I also started to grow it out so that when I hit high school, I had this insane amount of ... HAIR.  It was still thick, but now it was ridiculously curly, too and that resulted in mass frizz since I hadn't yet discovered the godsend that is Frizz Ease Gel. (Not to digress yet again but I remember not too long ago when Walmart stopped selling the gel for a hot minute for some reason and I nearly cried because nothing... NOTHING... has worked in my hair the way this product does. And no, I do not work for John Frieda and they did not supply me with anything to give such rave reviews.)

I went to four high schools (and people wondered why I was such an introvert) and got called "Slash" at the fourth high school.  I was pissed because I didn't know any of these asshole kids (it was a snobby rich high school and we were far from being rich), yet anytime I stepped foot in a the hall I would hear "Slash" so one day I had had it (I'm sure I was PMSing) and stopped this freshman looking kid, a boy, and grabbed him by his shirt and demanded he tell me why the fuck he (and others) were calling me Slash.

He looked at me like I was crazy and was all, "You know... Slash... Guns N Roses Slash? Your hair."

I let him go and continued on my way wondering how I couldn't figure it out since I was a huge GNR/Slash fan!  Yet it didn't click till the boy blurted it out.  And then I was proud for some stupid reason.  (God I hated that school so much. It was the last high school I attended and I hated it so much that I didn't even graduate on stage with the rest of the fuckfaces that went there.)

In reality, my hair isn't quite like Slash's (but isn't it gorgeous - along with his absolutely yummy lips?!?).  It's long and thick and curly and frizzy, but I don't think it's as much and I think that's because I'm all white.

Now, Lovie on the other hand...

Um, yeah.

Aside from having the cutest almost 5 month old in the world, we have one with rock star hair already!  And as much as I love her hair (which is really kinky curly...when it's wet, the curls shrink and get incredibly tight and her hair is less ... big, but when it's dry, like the pic above... :) Oh and when you pull it straight, it's a good three inches long already!), I'm getting a little concerned with how to ... control it. 

Do I put gel in it? 
Do I cut it? 
Do I just continue to let it grow and become even more Rock Star Hair-like? 

I've asked my husband what to do since he brought on the afro gene ;) and he's all, "I don't know. I'm a guy. My mom just always kept my hair short."

Oy.

And no, I will not be putting any ginormous headband with huge ass flowers as big as her face on her head.